Cracked

I am not completely broken because I will never let him break me again but I feel like I let him crack me. No, I know I let him crack me. I can not let him affect because when I allow him to, it affects every other aspect of my life. My visions blurs and I lose focus.

I know it's Thursday but I can not recall the last two days. I have been walking around in a daze. Conversations had have been forgotten. People seen have just been a blur of shadows in my memory. Roads traveled only by habit. Silence deafening. I sit in the dark now trying to recall anything that would be significant and only a few things stand out but to wrap my mind around them would be in vain.

This is not a place where I like to be. I feel like I have lost control. And to whom of all people...I know better than this. This game he plays. He took this round, I must admit but not without a fight. I did what I had to, to gain back the control I felt like I lost expect I fight smart. The hurtful words that had to be reread are just words not truths. Just opinions not facts. He's blaming me for his unhappiness and I have nothing to do with it anymore.

The future is unpredictable but I know that I must continue to move forward. I have put myself together the best I can and I can only continue down this path of rebuilding.